The Life That You Want


What is the life you want? Its a question that requires serious contemplation. Its a question that requires time being taken out to really focus on it. What is the life you want?

As I read the question on the page, it really stood out for me. It is a question that goes beyond just seeing the here and now, and it is a question that possibly too few people really give genuine consideration to.

In his book, It's All Too Much, author and organising guru Peter Walsh does not approach helping people achieve transformation in their lives just by getting them to do some decluttering or reorganizing their worldly possessions. Instead, he confronts people with a thought provoking and life changing question: What is the life that you want?

This question really is a deal breaking question. It is a question that stops the craziness of going round and round in circles and not really thinking about the way in which we currently are using our time, energy and resources.


A life that you want. Not the life that is being lived by someone else, such as someone famous. A life that is your life. A life that is deemed to be better and a more perfect fit for you. A life that you want to live during the one lifetime that you have.

As I gaze with some dread upon piles of papers and boxes of odds and ends that all need attention on the decluttering front, this question has really reasonated. When looking at one's home and possessions and the habits engaged in again and again, through the lens of this very question, somehow clarity seems to come through so much more sharper.

 It is a question that really and truly helps give greater clarity.

What is the purpose of this particular room, this cupboard, this drawer?

What is the purpose of this particular item I keep holding on to and which is taking up valuable real estate space in my home?

Is it appropriate that I am keeping it, in light of the life that I want?

Is it appropriate that I am storing away these items that have no actual purposeful daily use, and they don't let me achieve the life that I really want, in some measure right now?

Does each and every aspect of my current home situation serve the life that I want, and could start stepping into, right at this present moment?


What is the life that you want? It is really and truly a game changing question.

I am sure Peter Walsh is not suggesting that we suddenly all throw in the towel and do something outlandish, because having the life that is wanted is not about suddenly throwing the baby out with the bath water, to use a coined phrase.

No! The life that is wanted can be garnered by determining what are our actual real, true and desired priorities and making a conscious effort to move towards them, right now, today!

We need to stop making excuses, stop feeling sad and sorry for ourselves, and actively and consciously step by step, work towards working out the life that is wanted, from this moment forward. Each step, no matter how small, is a step closer to achieving the life wanted.

No one else can give you the life that you want. You know the life that you want, so it is completely up to you to take the first, the second and every other step after that towards having the life that you want.

Having the life that you want requires some adjustments to be made. Adjustments in thinking. Adjustments in the habitual practices engaged in day by day. Adjustments that lead to the desired goal. Adjustments that will allow for the better matching of that which is truly deserving of our time, energy and money and what it is that we ourselves are actually daily putting time, energy and at times money into! We can want it and we can endeavour to make the changes required.


Facing up to and getting rid of the various hurdles that prevent us from having the life that we want, can only be a good thing. Figuring them out, addressing them face on, will allow for the correct and true direction being sought to be followed.

If I want my child to take responsibility for feeding the dog, I need to implement it today. They need to start feeding the dog today. I need to show them the portion of food, how to put it out, how to clean up afterwards. I need to parent them step by step through the journey of having them take full responsibility for feeding the dog each and every day. Rather than get frustrated and annoyed, I just need to keep on with the keeping on of training up my child, until they get how it is done and they can fully run with doing the job independently.

If we want our bedroom to be a sanctuary and place of rest and recuperation, then we need to remove the piles of laundry off the chair and make an effort not to keep on with that habit. We need to regularly change the bed linen so that it is fresh and clean. We need to actually make the bed (no excuses!), so it always looks inviting because we want a life in which our bedrooms are a sanctuary and a place of rest and recuperation always. We need to add the little decor touches that soothe and calm and are restful for our eyes. We need to consider the overall smell of the room, the noise level, the feel of textures. We need to do what we can, to set in place what it is that we want.


Having the life that you want involves doing what is needed to see that little by little it is made a reality. Each day leads to the next, and each step leads to the desired end result: having the life that you want.

Yes, it takes work. Yes, it takes time, it takes energy and resources to have the life that you want, but it is worth it.

What is the life that you want? It is a question that is incredibly thought provoking and habit challenging.


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