Making ends meet. We all struggle to some degree or other to achieve it. There are those that follow a path of familiarity. They find it safe. They find it provides a sense of security. Looking back on the past, they feel it is the wisest path to take.
Yet, different times, differing circumstances simply do not fit in with the one-size-fits-all scenario. Like trying to stick a square peg in a round hole, sometimes it is just what it is: time for some creativity.
Creativity? Creativity?! What is that, you cry. I am just wanting to keep the boat afloat! I am doing all that I can to keep the boat afloat and now! Now you want to suggest I perhaps risk letting go and try something new?
Doing the same thing, repetitively does not prove it is the best option. Sometimes we can simply experience a sense of security because the repetition of what is actually just habit, makes us feel secure.
There is a difference, a major difference between feeling secure and BEING secure.
But, you stammer, it's the way I saw it done in my own life experience as a child and it produced sound results!
Yes, good old Mum and Dad/the chief home administrators in your childhood home, possibly did do exceptionally well to try and keep their particular boat afloat, whilst undertaking the particular crossing that they pursued. They did well however, in their circumstances, within the actual season they were experiencing, with what they particularly had, AT THAT ACTUAL TIME.
It's how that household over there does it, and it works because I have seen it work for them!
Yes. That's right. It works. for. them. One size does not fit all.
Running a household, meeting the needs of a specific household, requires that existing circumstances be acknowledged, the actual time and season be taken into consideration.
What size does not fit all, when it comes to any given household.
How exhausting trying to be what you simply are not. How exhausting trying to carry the load of something that has proven to be unachievable. How exhausting when the actual experience and season you in, just doesn't fit what you think it should.
You kept an orderly household prior to children? Well done. Go you!
Reality check: more people with specific needs, more activity within the same time-frame and space. Things are going to be different.
Meeting more people needs means something has to give: Achieving tasks.
There are those that are people focused. They are wired to meet the needs of others. They are wired to show mercy, compassion, understanding. They care-give. They nurture. They get exhausted. Drained.
Drained because they love much. They need their own needs to be perhaps more often meet, in the form of feeling replenished in the same way they give: giving time, care, meeting specific needs.
Those that are task focused thrive on getting things done to see a specific, envisioned outcome. They love the sense of accomplishment in seeing something taken from start to finish. They thrive on seeing the project, the job at hand resolved. They enjoy a sense of satisfaction in seeing an obvious outcome and conclusion played out before them.
Being task-focused means you can follow a process, expecting a particular fairly consistent result. You like that. It shows accomplishment. Results. It's predictable, hence producing a quicker sense of payback for your efforts.
Being people focused involves a lot of variables.
People: they are not a one-size-fits-all, predictable-set-of-results type of activity that you can get involved in and get to predictably 'fix'.
The unpredictably, the variety, the tapestry of numerous threads is only woven out as you go, when you are involved with the people factor within a household. Such is the experience of being people-focused.
Being task focused does not require the same level of emotional involvement as being people focused. It requires less dancing around trying to grab hold of all that might possibly be thrown at you. It is simply less predictable in outcome and result.
Working with and for people, is like participating in a ball game with random numbers of ball being thrown at you, from multiple directions, within a random sequence of time. Challenging, possibly fun, and definitely aimed at keeping you on your feet and relying on your wits.
Greater patience, greater creativity is required when you are dealing with people. Why? Because they are animated, not inanimate. They are subjective not objective.
Running a household involves both levels of experience, juggling both requirements, simply because it is made up of people, plus for the sake of those people, tasks have to be carried out.
In order to meet a sound, manageable balance of both meeting the needs of people within your household, plus getting all the tasks done, you need creativity.
You need to look at what is and actual, and explore responding accordingly. You need to be creative.
To run between both camps: the need to focus on people needs and the need to get certain tasks done, you need creativity.
Like the need for fun, the need for creativity helps extend what you have at hand, to cover what requires covering/attention, at the specific time.
Adaptation. Thinking beyond the predictable. Being prepared to deal with what exists, to make the most of what is at hand, in order to meet that specific need in a timely fashion, requires creativity.
Creativity involves letting go preconceived ideas that may actually be completely inappropriate.
Creativity is shrewd, resourceful, a clever use of wisdom and experience past, and involves a leap of faith to try something new.
Creativity is a tremendously talented tool. Cultivate it. Let it have more space in the garden of your life. You may be surprised at just what a resourceful tool it is.
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